Uncle Michael's Dispute Resolution Guide:
#1 The Oldest ALWAYS rides Shotgun - No exceptions
#2 Due to a Grandfathered Rule by Gramma Terry, only one of the kids is allowed to eat in the Cadillac There's an 84% Chance you ain't it.
#3 All attitude adjustments are adjusted with the brown leather belt. Start at the top - Follow Thru.
#4 Screaming, crying, pouting, temper tantrums, and bad attitudes are prohibited by law, punishable under UMDRG Rule #3.
#5 Because I said so, that's why.
#6 Hussle... And there's a good chance we can stop for ice cream.
Everyone always wonder why I'm the favorite uncle... Well, there you have it folks. No BS.
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